Distance and separation

March 29/16

Distance: the length of the space between two points. Distance is the thing I am putting between Liam and myself. I find myself constantly having to make space for myself to re-evaluate and see this situation from another perspective.

All of this is a mind game about perspective and outlook on any particular situation. A position we give to the head space we are in that doesn’t exist. We make up our minds about things and forget that we can change them. Change our perspective on everything, and anything. This is the kind of thinking that can save you from depression, and god knows it has saved me from falling back into a depressive spiral. Looking at my situation with Liam makes my mind reel just thinking about it… every time I blink I have a new way of looking at it. I would rather have one set view, and just move on.

I have no idea why my mind is forever hanging in the balance about this particular subject. Maybe this whole journalling thing is an escape and a place to voice my thoughts about useless stuff, and my experiences with bipolar disorder. Can someone please tell me if it ever gets any easier? More controlled than this?  I feel like I’m just spiraling lately…

xx Hailey

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